Over the past three years, I’ve learnt a lot about being a parent – having twins, it’s certainly felt as though we have been dropped in at the deep end. With no manual to call upon, it’s been very much ‘on-the-job’ learning and every day presents a new challenge. Having yoga as a reference point has certainly been beneficial on a personal level. Don’t get me wrong though, there are occasional days where even a yoga practice cannot help!
Notwithstanding the most challenging days, pausing for a few breaths and finding time to reflect on what we have achieved is hugely positive. Whether that’s when I’m practicing yoga, writing this blog post, or simply washing up, it all makes a difference. One of the key things that often comes to mind is not so much how much we are teaching the boys the ways of the world, but what they are teaching us about how to live our lives.
We were on a family holiday in Dorset last week and after a whirlwind week of fun in the sun, it was only as we sat at home that we reflected upon the week. In particular, we noted how adept the boys were at living in the moment. A car! A fire engine! A boat! A digger! A pink house! Statements on repeat throughout the week. Their one pointed focus made us appreciate the things around us that otherwise would have passed us by.
Their spirit of adventure encouraged us to see life through their lens. Their slowly growing confidence when waking the shoreline as tiny waves lapped onto the shore and over their feet as they initially scurried to safety before tentatively dipping their toes in. They are becoming far more accomplished on their bikes, and enjoyed whizzing around the campsite and beyond, reminding me of the freedom I felt when I first rode a bike.
More than anything though, spending a week with the boys reminded me how to be so open with emotions. You get what you see with the boys, and there is no emotional baggage because they offload it no sooner than it arises. Tears from tired boys at bedtime are soon replaced with loving hugs and kisses goodnight that not only makes the long days worthwhile, but also reminds me how in tune the boys are with their emotions.
The boys are too young to realise this yet, but they are my gurus – guiding lights on how to live my life. Being present in the moment, and not allowing the external environment (including iPhones and such like) to distract from the most important things in life. Rekindling that spirit of adventure, and seeking out the simple things in life for fulfilment. In tune with emotions and saying what is felt, more than what is thought.
In years to come, the boys may well read this blog and be very embarrassed by their Dad writing such things. As they grow older, they may also no longer consider themselves to be like this. I hope this acts as a useful reminder, not just for them, but also for me.